You Need To Fix Your Marriage When You Have a Toxic Relationship

Posted on January 14, 2011
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It is true of life that some relationships go through the infrequent coarse patch. In most cases, you will want to fix your marriage and these things are worked out ; either thru sane conversation or some disagreeing, but the issues get resolved. However , there are some situations that are not satisfactory.

This is frequently referred to as a toxic relationship. These are some signs to have a look for to determine if your relationship is damaging.

* Your mate tries to compel you to be dependent on them for basic needs .

* You made changes you normally would not have to keep them pleased.

* They control your life and check on you to be certain you are doing what they think you should.

* They verbally put you down in front of folks.

* They are physically, mentally or emotionally abusive or manipulative.

* Their is no evidence that they really love you, though they may say otherwise.

Briefly toxic folk are not good to be around, they are poison in the figurative sense. Therefore how does anyone get into such a relationship, and why do they stay? On the surface, the easy answer is that no-one would or should, but the truth of the matter is that they do.

The reason for this is that poisonous relationships run in cycles. There are three basic stages : the honeymoon, where everything appears good and there’s lots of hope for a happier future ; the problem stage, here’s where the issues occur ; reconciliation, where the offending party compensates for what they went and did wrong. This then leads right back to the honeymoon stage and it starts all over again.

once you know about this cycle, it’s simpler to understand how people get encircled in bad relations. There is actually just one stage where things seem bad. After that, they see their toxic mate is trying to do better and is sorry for what they did. Everyone merits a second chance, right? Then the honeymoon phase is going great, they are ecstatic again, and prepared to pardon and forget. But , then the issues start again.

therefore why don’t folk get out of toxic relations at this point? Well, if you think about it, you can see that they already have explanation that their partner can change. This explanation comes in the shape of the previous reconciliation stage. From an objective observer that can be hard to credit, but that’s how the person in the relationship sees it. And, there’s also another honeymoon stage right round the corner.

What’s the key to fixing and restoting? Consider it as an addiction . The drug is the issue stage, and the honeymoon stage is the high that is felt. And you cannot get the high without the drug. Therefore , if you are in a damaging relationship, you have to break out of it at the issue stage and somehow heal that relationship. Now you know the signs you can be ready to do something. Don’t kid yourself. Get aid. Do whatever you need to do to get the respect you actually merit. It will be troublesome, but you’ll have a happier life when you do.

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